Tinsel Town Rebellion


1. FINE GIRL

Well, yeah, well,
Oh yeah,
She was a fine girl
She could get down wit de get down
All de way down
She do yer laundry
She change a tire
Chop a little wood for de fire
Poke it around . . . if it died down

Oh yeah,
She was a fine girl
She go up in the mornin'
She go down in the evenin' . . . all de way down
She do the dishes
If you wishes
Silverware too
Make it look brand new . . . when she get through
Oh yeah,
She was a fine girl
Outa this world

Well, yeah, well, yeah, well, yeah, well,
Oh yeah,
She was a fine girl
She could get down wit de get down
All de way down
She do yer laundry
She change a tire
Chop a little wood for de fire
Poke it around . . . if it died down

Oh yeah,
She was a fine girl
With a lovely smile
With a bucket on her head
Fulla water from the well
She could run a mile
Oh yeah
She wouldn't spill a drop
It'd stay on top
Her head was kinda flat
But her hair covered that
She was a fine girl
Didn't need no school
She was built like a mule
With a thong sandal
Well, wasn't no kinda job she could not handle
She could get down . . . wit de get down
All de way down
We need some more like dat, in dis kinda town
We need some more like dat, in dis kinda town


2. EASY MEAT

This girl is easy meat
I seen her on the street
See-thru blouse an' a tiny little dress
Her manner indiscreet . . . I knew she was
Easy, easy, easy meat
Easy, easy, easy meat
Easy, easy, easy, easy
Easy meat, easy meat, easy meat, easy meat

She wanna take me home
Make me sweat and moan
Rub my head and beat me off
With a copy of Rolling Stone
Easy, easy, easy meat
Easy, easy, easy meat
Easy, easy, easy, easy
Easy meat, easy meat, easy meat, easy meat

(BREAK)
If you'd play [something else?]
because, uh, they're just not gonna stand for it.

I told her I was late
I had another date
I can't get off on the Rolling Stone
But the robots think it's great . . . I knew she was
Easy, easy, easy meat
Easy, easy, easy meat
Easy, easy, easy, easy
Easy meat, easy meat, easy meat, easy meat

Easy
Aw the girl's so easy!
Easy
Saw her tiny titties
Through her see-thru blouse
I just had to take the girl to my house
Easy
Meat


3. FOR THE YOUNG SOPHISTICATE

Baby baby why you cryin'
Feeling sorry what she said
Put down that rag, I told her then
Don't wanna hear you cry again
Dear heart, dear heart
Tell me, tell me what's the reason
Dear heart, dear heart
Tell me, tell me what's the reason

You know she went to see the doctor
And then she read a magazine
Forget that book, I told her then
Don't wanna hear about the book again
Dear heart, dear heart
WORK OUT, VINNIE
Tell me, tell me what's the reason
I THOUGHT YOU WERE IN LOVE, VINNIE

There was a picture on the story
That showed a young sophisticator
Who falls in love three pages later
With some agressive agitator
And by and by he comes to hate her
'Cause she don't shave her underarms
And he can't go for that
'Cause he's a young sophisticator
Ha ha ha ha ha ha

Baby, baby why you cryin'
It made me wonder what she said
Forget that book, I told her then
Don't wanna hear about the book again
Dear heart, dear heart
HOW YOU DOIN', VINNIE?
Tell me, tell me what's the reason

Would you still love me if my hair grew
All down the side of my kimono
Well of course I would, it might be hip
If it did not cause you to trip
Dear heart, dear heart
Or radiate a bad aroma
Dear heart, dear heart
Or radiate a cheap aroma
Dear heart, dear heart
Or radia-iaate, or radia-ia-ia-iate a BUTZIS aroma
Ha ha ha ha ha ha


4. LOVE OF MY LIFE

Love of my life, love of my life
Love of my life, I love you so
Love of my life, don't ever go
I love you only
Love, love of my life

Stars in the sky
They never lie
Tell me you need me
Don't say goodbye
I love you only
Love, love of my life

Stars in the sky
They never lie
Tell me you need me
Don't say goodbye
I love you darling
I love you only
Don't ever leave me
Don't make me lonely

Love of my life
I love you so
Love of my life
Don't ever go
I love you only
Love, love of my life
Love of my life
Love of my life
Love of my life
Love of my life
Love of my . . .


5. I AIN'T GOT NO HEART

Ain't got no heart
I ain't got no heart to give away
I sit and laugh at fools in love
There ain't no such thing as love
No angels singing up above today

Girl I don't believe
Girl I don't believe in what you say
You say your heart is only mine
I say to you, you must be blind
What makes you think you're so fine
That I would throw away
The GROOVY life I lead?
'Cause baby, what you've got, yeah
It sure ain't what I need

Girl you'd better go
Girl you'd better go away
I think that life with you would be
Just not wuite the thing for me
Why is it so hard to see my way?

Why should I be stuck with you
It's just not what I want to do
Why should an embrace or two
Make me such a part of you?
I ain't got no heart to give away
Away
No no no no no no no
Ain't got no heart
Ain't got no heart
I ain't got no heart to give away


6. PANTY RAP

[The  following  song-related  information was included in the liner notes:
Historic  Footnote:   ALSO  .   .  .  the business about the underpants and
making a quilt out of them etc., well .  .  .  it's really being made (yes,
right  at this very moment) by a lady artist in Lyons, Colorado named Emily
James .  .  .  and, as if that weren't exciting enough, Ms.  James insisted
that all those lovely little under-garments you donated at the concerts NOT
BE WASHED, thereby maintaining some exquisite sort of organic miasma in the
vicinity  of  the  finished  work of art.  She estimates it will take her a
year  to  complete,  and, when it's done, she plans to exhibit in galleries
across the US.]

FZ:   "Hello  there,  welcome  to  the  show.   No, we are not going to play
'Cheepnis'  -  that's  right - but we are collecting underpants, and we are
collecting  brassieres,  we  are  collecting  small   articles  of  feminine
underclothing.  We are making a quilt .  .  .  really - trust me.

So  here's  the deal, if you're a girl and you're wearing a dress, whip 'em
off,  that's  it,  see?  No problem.  Even with a pin .  .   .  what does it
say?   'Nobody's  Perfect.' I guess so .  .  .  What we got here?  Oh.  Now
let's  see  what's  on  the  inside.   Uh huh, trainer coos.  Okay.  S'more
s'more  .  .  .  Underpants, brassieres, just send 'em up, no problem.   Oh,
you'll warm up to it.

If  you're wearing pants and you have bikinis on underneath your pants, rip
the  edges  and  pull  'em out; if you're wearing those big ol' ugly cotton
jobs go to the toilet and take 'em off, okay?

So  far,  ladies and gentlemen, the response from this particular community
has  not  been  especially  gratifying.   Perhaps   you're  a little bit too
intellectual  here.  Here's something .  .  .  tasteful, very tasteful .  .
Oh,  some  more  -  look - it's almost like going to a .  .   .  well, never
mind.  Heh, heh, heh.

I  just want to remind you that you are in direct competition with Chicago,
which  so  far has produced the highest yield of female underclothes of any
place in the United States.  Oh, here's one, thank you very much.  Chicago,
if  you'll  recall was the town in which we received the Very Famous Voodoo
Butter  Underpants  .   .   .  heh heh .  .   .  the pants that nearly broke
Tommy  Mars'  neck.  As soon as he took a whiff of those his head went back
THIS  far, and he was heard to mutter 'JEEZUS.' So, we don't care what kind
of condition they're in.

What've  we  got  here?   'Twat  Book',  okay.    Uh huh, very good - Zeets,
whaddya think?  He already has that one .  .  .  no problem, though.   Well,
tonight  you're  going  to  be  entertained  by:    Ike Willis on guitar and
vocals;  Tommy  Mars  on  keyboards  and 'JEEZUS'.  You're also going to be
entertaining  yourselves a little bit, but don't worry about it.  Steve Vai
on guitar, vocals and light blue hair."

IKE: "Another contestant over there."

FZ:  "Oh, some more?  Okay, Vinnie Colaiuta on booklet.  Now what does this
say?  'My hat from the .  .  .  how about wearing my hat .  .   .  WEARING .
.   .   How  about  this, this is supposed to be a college community right?
'How  about wearing, W-E-R-E-I-N-G, never mind.  Arthur Barrow on bass; Bob
Harris  on  keyboards,  high  vocal trumpet and vegetables; and, ladies and
gentlemen,  the  world  famous  Ray  White on guitar and vocals.   Okay, you
ready?  One, Two three, four .  .  ."


7. TELL ME YOU LOVE ME

Tell me you love me, tell me you love me
Like I want you to
Tell me you love me, tell me you love me
Girl . . . Girl . . . Girl . . .
I love you so hard now, I'm cryin' for you
Don't make me lose my pride
I want to come inside
And grab ahold of you, thank you
Grab ahold of you

Tell me you love me, tell me you love me
Like I want you to
Tell me you love me, tell me you love me
Girl . . . Girl . . . Girl . . .
I want to feel it, give me your love now
Don't make me steal it, don't make me steal it
Tell me you love me, tell me you love me
Tell me you love me, tell me you love me
Tell me you love me, tell me you love me
Tell me you love me, tell me you love me

Tell me you love me, tell me you love me
Like I want you to
Tell me you love me, tell me you love me
Girl . . . Girl . . . Girl . . .
I love you so hard now, I'm cryin' for you
Burnin' with fire, I gotta hot desire
'Cause I gotta make love with you
'Cause I gotta make love with you
I gotta make love with you
'Cause I gotta make love with you

Tell me you love me, like I want you to
Tell me you love me, like I want you to
Tell me you love me, like I want you to


8. NOW YOU SEE IT - NOW YOU DON'T

(Instrumental)


9. DANCE CONTEST

FZ:   "One  of  the,  one of the things I like about playing in New York is
this  particular  place, because it has - it has a stage which is conducive
to,  how  you say in the trade, audience participation.  Now if there's one
thing  that  I really like, it's, uh, audience participation.  Now listen .
.   .   I  gotta think of something that I can, uh - do you think we should
have  another  dance  contest  tonight?  Oh, hey - the injured person dance
contest.   Well, let's see .  .  .  Awright, I'll tell you what we're going
to do.  Here's a guy who really wants to be in the dance contest, aw-reety,
aw-righty, hey, Okay .  .  ."

BUTCH:   "You  are great, man - you are great.  You are the best, baby.  Do
'Dinah-More Humm.'"

FZ:   "All  right, now wait a minute - what's your name?  Hey, hey - what's
your name?"

BUTCH: "Butch."

FZ:   "Awright,  the  dynamic Butch.  Here's a girl who wants to dance with
Butch.  What's your name?"

LENA: "Lena."

FZ: "What?"

LENA: "Lena."

FZ:   "Lena,  meet  Butch.   Okay, Lena and Butch, couple number one.  Heh,
heh.   Okay, let's see - that guy there .  .  .  that - that one there with
the  teeshirt  on  - no, no, the other one - this one - no, no - no, no no,
wait  a  minute,  wait  .  .  .  well, you're - actually, you're very nice,
though.   Would  you  like to come up here?  .  .  .   Okay, but d'you think
you can behave yourself?  .  .  .  You're sure you can behave yourself .  .
Okay, what's your name?"

GUY:   "Tom,  man  (mumble, mumble) you, baby.  I (mumble, mumble) (gurgle)
you (mumble, mmf, etc.)"

GUY: "Arrgh, mmmf, glurg, etc."

FZ: "Awright, now wait a minute. Awright, awright, now wait . . ."

GUY: "(mumble, mmf) Ugliness! Ugliness!"

OTHER GUY: "Frank, you're my buddy! Arrgh, mmf."

FZ:   "Awright,  now  wait  a  minute,  wait a minute.  I have an important
message  to  deliver  to all the cute people all over the world.  If you're
cute,  maybe you're beautiful.  I just want to tell you somethin' - there's
more of us ugly mother fuckers than you are, hey-y, so watch out.  Now ..."

GUY: (BUTCH?): "Can I bring my girlfriend on stage maybe?"

FZ:   "Sure.   All right, now you - he wants to get his girlfriend - go get
your girlfriend."

GIRL: "Hey Zap!"

FZ: "Good to see you again."

GIRL: "Squeak!"

FZ: "I know."

GUY: "I ain't no fuckin' queer."

FZ:   "All  right, now look, here's what we're going to do.   Awright.  Now.
This - it'll be mashed, I'll save them, I'll save them for later."

GUY: "I'm not a fucking queer."

FZ:   This  man  is trying desperately to let everyone know that he's not a
queer.   He's not queer, he's not queer.  Awright, and now .  .   .  You are
going to dance, like you've never danced before .  .  ."


10. THE BLUE LIGHT

Your Ethos
Your Pathos
Your Porthos
Your Aramis
Your Brut Cologne
You're writing home
You are hopeless
Your hopelessness
Is rising around you, rising around you
You like it
It gives you something to do
In the day time

Hey, buddy, you need a hobby
You are tired of moving forward
You think of the future
And secretly you piddle your pants
The puddle of piddle
Which used to be little
Is rising around you, rising around you
You like it
It gives you something to do
In the night time

Well, you travel to bars
You also go to WINCHELL'S DOUGHNUTS
And hang out with the Highway Patrol
Sometimes you go to a pizza place
You go to SHAKEY'S to get that
American kind of pizza
That has the ugly, waxey, fake yellow kind
Of cheese on the top
Maybe you go to STRAW HAT PIZZA,
To get all of those artificial ingredients
That never belonged on a pizza in the first place
(But the white people really like it . . .)
Oh well, you'll go anyplace, you'll do anything
Oh you'll give me your underpants
I HOPE THESE AREN'T YOURS, BUDDY
THEY'RE VERY NICE, THOUGH
You'll go to Santa Monica Boulevard
You'll go to the Blue Parrot
No problem, you'll go anyplace
You'll do anything
Just so you can hang out with the others
[Ooooh!]
The others
[Ooooh!]
Just like you
Afraid of the future
(DEATH VALLEY DAYS straight ahead)
The future is scary
Yes, it sure is

Well, the puddle is rising
It smells like the ocean
A body of water to isolate England
And also Reseda
The oil, in patches
All over Atlantis, Atlantis
You remember Atlantis
Donovan, the guy with the brocade coat
Used to sing to you about Atlantis
You loved it, you were so involved then
That's back in the days when you used to
Smoke a banana
You would scrape the stuff off the middle
You would bake it
You would smoke it
You even thought you was getting ripped from it
No problem
Ah Atlantis, they could really get down there
The plankton, the krill
The giant underwater pyramid, the squid decor
EXCUSE ME, TODD
The big ol' giant underwater door
The dome, the bubbles, the blue light

Light, light, light, light
Blue light blue light
The seepage, the sewage, the rubbers, the napkins
Your ethos, your pathos
Your flag hole, your port hole
Your language
Your future
You're frightened
Your future
You can't even speak your own fucking language
You can't read it anymore
You can't write it anymore
Your language
The future of your language
Your meat loaf
Don't let your meat loaf
Heh, Heh, Heh
Your Micro-Nanette
Your Brut
Cologne


11. TINSEL TOWN REBELLION

From MADAME WONG'S to STARWOOD
To the WHISKEY on The Strip
You can hear the crashing, blasting strum
Of bands that come to be real hip
And get a record contract
From a talent scout someday
They'll sell their ass, their cocks and balls
They'll take the check 'n walk away
If they're lucky they'll get famous
For a week or two perhaps
They'll buy some ugly clothes to wear
And hope the business don't collapse
Before some stupid magazine
Decides they're really good
They're a Tinsel Town Rebellion Band
From downtown Hollywood

Tinsel Town Rebellion, Tinsel Town Rebellion Band
It's a little bitty Tinsel Town Rebellion
A Tinsel Town Rebellion Band

They used to play all kinds of stuff
And some of it was nice
Some of it was musical
But then they took some guy's advice
To get a record deal, he said
They would have to be more PUNK
Forget their chops and play real dumb
Or else they would be sunk
So off they go to S.I.R. to learn some stupid riffs
And practise all their poses
In between their powder sniffs

CHOP A LINE NOW, SNORT IT UP NOW

And when they think they've got it
They launch a new career
Who gives a fuck if what they play
Is somewhat insincere?

Tinsel Town Rebellion, Tinsel Town Rebellion Band
A Tinsel Town Rebellion
A Tinsel Town Rebellion Band
Did you know that in Tinsel Town the people down there
Think that SUBSTANCE is a bore
And if your New Wave group looks good
They'll hurry on back for more
Of leather groups and plastic groups
And groups that look real queer
The Tinsel Town aficionados
Come to see and not to hear
But then again this system works
As perfect as a dream
It works for all of those record company pricks
Who come to skim the cream
From the cesspools of excitement
Where Jim Morrison once stood
It's the Tinsel Town Rebellion
From downtown Hollywood


12. PICK ME, I'M CLEAN

Why not come over?
You'll meet my mother
You'll meet my sister
You'll like my brother
REALLY YOU WILL . . .

Then she said
I'm learning English
I can say "THANK YOU"
I think I like you
Do you like my band-aid?
I HOPE YOU DO . . .

Oh, oh, oh
I am not busy
I'm free to travel
Where are you going?
Maybe you'll take me
I HOPE YOU DO . . .

Oh, she asked me
Do you know Vinnie?
He used to like me
I speak good English
I'm bathing with Peter
Pick me, I'm clean . . .

Vinnie goes bare-back
Peter goes wet-back
Denny goes way back
Eddie should get back
Pick me, I'm clean . . .

Oh yeah, pick me I'm clean
Oh yeah, check out my band-aid
Oh yeah, pick me I'm clean
Oh yeah, check out my band-aid
Oh yeah, pick me I'm clean
Oh yeah, check out my band-aid
Oh yeah, pick me I'm clean
Oh, yeah . . .

Why not come over?
You'll meet my mother
You'll meet my sister
You'll like my brother
REALLY YOU WILL . . .

I'm learning English
I can say "THANK YOU"
I think I like you
Do you like my band-aid?
I HOPE YOU DO . . .

Do you know Vinnie?
He used to like me
I speak good English
I'm bathing with Peter
Pick me, I'm clean . . .


13. BAMBOOZLED BY LOVE

Bamboozled by love
Oh lord, the shit done hit the fan
Bamboozled by love
Oh lord, the shit done hit the fan
The way that girl been carryin' on
I swear I just don't understand
Don't you know I treat her nice and kind
The way no other lover can
Now don't you know I treat her nice and kind
The way no other lover can
I came home the other day and she was
Suckin' off some other man

I ain't the type for beggin'
I ain't the type to plead
If she don't change those evil ways
I'm gonna make her bleed
She can scream and she can holler
Bang her head all along the wall
If she don't give me what I want
She gonna have no head at all

Bamboozled by love
I said she fooled around too long
Bamboozled by love
I said she fooled around too long
Now I am mad and gettin' meaner
I am here and she is gone
And the reason you have not seen her
She is underneath the lawn
I said she's underneath the lawn, lawn, lawn

Now look I ain't the type for beggin'
I ain't the type to plead
If she don't change those evil ways
I'm gonna make her bleed
She can scream and she can holler
Bang her head all along the wall
If she don't give me what I want
She gonna have no head at all

Bamboozled by love
I said she fooled around too long
Bamboozled by love
I said she fooled around too long
Now I am mad and gettin' meaner, meaner
I am here and she is gone
And the reason you have not seen her, seen her
She is underneath the lawn


14. BROWN SHOES DON'T MAKE IT

Brown shoes don't make it
Brown shoes don't make it
Quit school, why fake it
Brown shoes don't make it
TV dinner by the pool
Watch your brother grow a beard
Got another year of school
You're okay, he's too weird
Be a plumber
He's a bummer
He's a bummer every summer
Be a loyal plastic robot
For a world that doesn't care
THAT'S RIGHT
Smile at every ugly
Shine on your shoes and cut your hair

Be a jerk - go to work
Be a jerk - go to work
Be a jerk - go to work
Be a jerk - go to work

Do your job, and do it right
Life's a ball
TV tonight
Do you love it
Do you hate it
There it is
The way you made it

A world of secret hungers
Perverting the men who make your laws
Every desire is hidden away
In a drawer in a desk by a Naugahyde chair
On a rug where they walk and drool
Past the girls in the office
We see in the back
Of the City Hall mind
The dream of a girl about thirteen
Off with her clothes and into a bed
Where she tickles his fancy
All night long

His wife's attending an orchid show
She squealed for a week to get him to go
But back in the bed his teenage queen
Is rocking and rolling and acting obscene
Baby, baby . . .
Baby, baby . . .

Gimmie then cakes, uh!
If I do I'm gonna lose my . . .

And he loves it, he loves it
It curls up his toes
She wipes his fat neck
And it lights up his nose
But he cannot be fooled
Old City Hall Fred
She's nasty, she's nasty
She digs it in bed
That's right

Do it again, ha
And do it some more
Hey, that does it, by golly
And she's nasty for sure
Nasty nasty nasty
Nasty nasty nasty
ONLY THIRTEEN AND SHE KNOWS HOW TO NASTY
She's a dirty young mind, corrupted
Corroded
Well she's thirteen today
And I hear she gets loaded

If she were my daughter, I'd . . .
What would you do, Frankie?
If she were my daughter, I'd . . .
What would you do, Frankie?
Check this out
Smother my daughter in chocolate syrup
And strap her on again, oh baby
Smother that girl in chocolate syrup
And strap her on again, oh baby
She's my teen-age baby
She turns me on
I'd like to make her do a nasty
On the White House lawn
Smother my daughter in chocolate syrup
And boogie till the cows come home

Time to go home
Madge is on the phone
Gotta meet the Gurney's and a dozen gray attorneys
TV dinner by the pool
I'm so glad I finished school
Life is such a ball
I run the world From City Hall


15. PEACHES III

FZ: "Let's hear it for another great Italian, Conlon Nancarrow, ladies and
gentlemen. Let's hear it for another great Italian, ladies and gentlemen,
Warren Cucurullo - work out, Warren. Let's hear it for another great
Italian, Al Dimeola, ladies and gentlemen.

Let's hear it for another great Italian, Alvin Lee, ladies and gentlemen .
. .Vinnie, Butzis, Vinnie's girlfriend, Butzis' girlfriend, Patty, Denny,
uh, Marty . . . forget your name even though you've been in the crew for
awhile . . . David, Ike . . ."

ED: "I'm flippin' out."

IKE: "I'll flip you to see who gets the room tonight."

FZ: "Ed, another Vinnie, Arthur, Al Dimeola, ladies and gentlemen. Thanks
for coming to the show, hope you enjoyed it. On behalf of Alvin Lee, see
you next time.



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